Dear Corner, When it comes to the journey between popping the question and tying the knot, How Long Is TOO Long For You To Start Worrying You’re Never Going To Get Married?
Dear Corner, When it comes to the journey between popping the question and tying the knot, How Long Is TOO Long (Before & After He Puts A Ring On It) For You To Start Worrying You’re Never Going To Get Married?
My fiancé and I dated for 4 ½ years before he FINALLY pooped the question! He use to say that he didn’t want to ruin what we already had. That it is just a piece of paper so why change things so I was so relived and happy to FINALLY be engaged that I think I forgot about the finish line! We’ve been engaged for almost three years and have no date set for the wedding. I’ve been trying not to be wishy washy about themes and ideas and whatnot, but I’ve had so much time to think about it and I keep finding things I like more. Also it’s tiring having to answer questions and fend off jokes all the time.
I love my fiancé terribly and I know we’ll get married when we’re emotionally and financially ready, and the wedding itself shouldn’t really be that big of a deal…but dammit, it’s a big deal to me! I REALLY want to hear from you ladies out there!!
Sincerely, How Long Is TOO Long To Wait
Dear How Long Is TOO Long,
I say every couple is different and every relationship is different! Some meet and know instantly that they want to be married. Some decide to wait and just live their lives and marriage is just a formality. The only true too long is if partners are mismatched in their timeline and expectations. To me, the only real way to wait too long is if one partner gets sick of waiting, and calls the entire relationship into question. Then, and only then, you’ve waited too long. When people speak about marriage they often use words like “settle down” and “tied down” and I don’t think that’s how it should be. Neither of your lives is going to end when you get married – you will keep living and having fun…together!
In a relationship you need to love each other, you need to like each other; you need to enjoy each other’s company and you need to have fun together; especially while you are young. He may feel like he hasn’t done enough “living” yet and might be under what I believe is a false impression that once he is “tied down” he won’t be able to live and do all those fun things anymore…so start doing them now! If he wants to go sky diving then do it! Make lists of things each of you want to do and make a point of doing them, together if possible.
Since being married is important to you, then you need to have a serious conversation with him about this. Even if you get married tomorrow it doesn’t mean you won’t ever lose him. Nothing is set in stone. Communicate NOW and enjoy your time together…
Remember…If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse…
Corner Family (especially Ladies), what are YOUR Thoughts???